If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn’t do it, it is sin for them. ~James 4:17 (NIV) This is one of my favorite verses in Scripture because it reminds me that sin isn’t just doing something bad but can also be not doing something good. If we know the good […]
It Takes More Than a, Yes…
On this Saint Valentine’s Day I’m going to write about duty sex. No, it’s not a very romantic topic, but, many of you are giving it or are receiving it so I thought I write about it. We talk a lot about intimacy and how true intimacy, allowing one’s true self to be known, can […]
Are You Wooable?
I’ve been a member of The Marriage Bed Forum (TMB) since July of 2004. I think it’s a good community of believers committed to promoting Christian marriage. It’s a Christian forum on sex so it is also well moderated, which is what also makes it a good community. Very often a newbie will give marriage […]
When the Price of Peace Gets Too High
What is the price you are paying for peace within your marriage? What part of yourself do you hide from your spouse to keep the peace in your marriage? What portion of your integrity are you selling out? Is it worth the price? We’ve all done it. We all hold back because to not do […]
Control or Intimacy, You Can’t Have Both
A quote I read recently attributed to Laura Boyle made some things click for me. Control and intimacy are opposites. I can have one or the other, not both. ~Laura Doyle This quote clarified how Dr. David Schnarch’s (affiliate link) articles People Have Sex Within The Limits of Their Development, People Who Can’t Control Themselves […]
Intimacy Isn’t Just a Code Word for Sex
Intimacy is difficult A post by J at Hot, Holy & Humorous and another by Julie over at Intimacy in Marriage got me to thinking about intimacy in marriage and, no, I don’t just mean sex which spurned the Intimacy Isn’t Just a Code Word for Sex series. In the fist post of the series […]
Intimacy Isn’t Just a Code Word for Sex
A post by J at Hot, Holy & Humorous and another by Julie over at Intimacy in Marriage got me to thinking about intimacy in marriage and, no, I don’t just mean sex. In our last post I shared this definition for intimacy: Intimacy is the act of allowing someone to truly know the real […]
Intimacy Isn’t Just a Code Word for Sex
A post by J at Hot, Holy & Humorous and another by Julie over at Intimacy in Marriage got me to thinking about intimacy in marriage and, no, I don’t just mean sex. This is how I’d like us to define intimacy for this and all our discussions: Intimacy is the act of allowing someone […]
Sexual Intimacy Assumptions Can Wreak Ha...
I’m thrilled to have Julie Sibert of www.IntimacyInMarriage.com. as our first ever guest poster. Here at A Grown Up Marriage we talk quite a bit about qualities like integrity, honesty, and truth. We talk about how these qualities serve to enhance all aspects of intimacy, being truly known, in our marriage. Too often in marriage […]
Crucible or Fireplace?
Over the years I’ve been a member of a number of Internet forums, more than one on marriage. During that time a recurring theme that shows up on the marriage forums is the idea of being happy for what you have without expecting anything more as if marital intimacy is a continuum with an end […]
Integrity, Do You Have It?
As I mentioned in my last post I’m currently reading ScreamFree Marriage (affiliate link) by Hal and Jenny Hunkle. In chapter three the book discusses “Authentic Self-Representation” (ASR), Dr. David Schnarch (affiliate link) would call ASR “integrity.” Basically it is what it sounds like, authentically representing yourself to your spouse. If you haven’t read ScreamFree […]