I’ve been a husband for almost 25 years, about half my life now. For the most part I think we guys, men, husbands, fathers get a bad wrap from society, occasionally for good reason but usually because of stereotypes or for sport. Not all men are the same but there are some commonalities to many […]
What is Gatekeeping?
One of the questions that I get asked about marital sex is, what exactly is a gatekeeper? What does a gatekeeper do? Why is gatekeeping not a good thing? Well basically a gatekeeper allows for regular sex but only on their terms. They limit sex to only those things they are comfortable doing very seldom […]
The Power of Eroticism in Marital Sex
One of my favorite posts by Dr. David Schnarch (affiliate link) is People Have Sex Within The Limits of Their Development. it is one of my favorites because it challenges the reader to realize that to mature beyond their current limits will require some feelings of nervousness and anxiety. The process toward maturity is not […]
Marriage Helper: Sexual Rejection’s Eff
You May Think You’re Being Generous, Per
Perhaps you are no longer refusing your spouse sex and you feel you’re being a generous by going past your preference for less sex but don’t realize that you have moved from being an outright refuser of sex to a gatekeeper of sexual pleasure. What is the difference between a “refuser” and a “gatekeeper”? A […]
This Isn’t a Sex Blog…
it’s a marriage blog. There are a number of reasons that I write so much about sex. First, I’m a married man that enjoy sex with my wife. Second, sex is what differentiates marriage from every other relationship. Two perfectly healthy individuals married but not having sex might as well be roommates sharing expenses. Third, […]
Guest Post Today at Hot, Holy and Humoro...
I’m guest posting today over at Hot, Holy and Humorous on Sexual Appetite. It’s probably not exactly what you think…
Why Don’t Women Need Sex?
J’s post Does Sexy Lingerie Promote a Perverted View of Beauty? got me to thinking about perceived differences between men and women. Honestly, it actually began with two posts by Pastor Bob Russell, Wives, Help Your Husbands Stay Pure! (1 Corinthians 6-7) and Husbands, Help Your Wives Stay Pure!, but J’s post is what prompted […]
Intimacy Isn’t Just a Code Word for Sex
A post by J at Hot, Holy & Humorous and another by Julie over at Intimacy in Marriage got me to thinking about intimacy in marriage and, no, I don’t just mean sex. This is how I’d like us to define intimacy for this and all our discussions: Intimacy is the act of allowing someone […]
Sex and the Good Samaritan
The church at Corinth was having issues regarding sex and sent questions to the Apostle Paul about the issues they were facing. Below is a part of Paul’s answer to the church at Corinth. 1 Corinthians 7:1-6 Now for the matters you wrote about: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations […]
Some Observations on Sex
I’ve only been at this blogging thing for a little but I have some observations to make about somethings I think I’m seeing. Sex Is A Huge Issue In Many Marriages As I’ve mentioned before the posts that draw the largest audience are the posts that I’ve made about sex. The more sexually obvious the […]
Naked and Unashamed
As a follow up to It’s Just Sex… I thought it would be a good idea to further explore the idea of how sex is more than “just sex.” Intimacy is more than a code word for sex. Intimacy in and of itself has a greater meaning in marriage beyond the physically intimate. Choosing to […]
It’s Just Sex…
Ever heard this in your marriage? How about felt like that was the attitude of your spouse? It’s damaging to so many marriages. When we marry we marry “for better or worse” with the understanding that we’ll all work for “better.” Too many spouses are worried more about how little they can get by with […]
Marriage and Class Five Rapids
We live in an overly sexualized culture. Sexual messages are all around us everyday on billboards, TVs, and the Internet. As a Christian I believe that sex was designed specifically for the marital relationship. The best analogy I’ve ever heard compared sex to a class five rapid. A class five rapid is a powerful force […]