it’s a marriage blog.

There are a number of reasons that I write so much about sex. First, I’m a married man that enjoy sex with my wife. Second, sex is what differentiates marriage from every other relationship. Two perfectly healthy individuals married but not having sex might as well be roommates sharing expenses. Third, and probably most importantly, sex, being exclusive to marriage, is the aspect of marriage that reveals our intimacy issues more than any other aspect of the marital relationship. Therefore, the sexual relationship reveals the areas in our life where we need to grow intimately.

I don’t think it was a mistake that Paul used the marital relationship to describe Christ’s relationship to the Church. I believe that the relationship between each believer individually and collectively with Christ is to be an intimate (not just sex) relationship.

There are things that we want to share with our spouse and there are things that our spouse wants to share with us and those things usually aren’t the same. It goes something like this, the higher drive spouse for sex has trouble being emotionally vulnerable with their sexually lower drive spouse because they don’t feel sexually connected to them. All the while the higher drive spouse for emotional connection has trouble being physically vulnerable (sexual) with their sexually higher drive spouse because they don’t feel emotionally connected to them. Do you see what is happening here? One spouse needs the other to provide sex to feel emotionally connected while the other needs the emotional connection to be vulnerable sexually.

Opposites do attract. I think it’s for a reason. Marriage reveals our weaknesses. For marriage to improve and grow we all need to work on our weaknesses. In my marriage I needed to learn to be more emotionally vulnerable and connected to my wife and my wife needed to work on some of her weaknesses for our marriage to improve. We’re never done learning or growing.

Now back to Paul’s analogy of marriage between Christ and His Church. God already knows us. We can’t hide anything from him, though we fool ourselves into believing otherwise. Our relationships with others are used to identify where we need to grow in relationship to our intimacy with Him. So, what do you think you’re hiding from your spouse?

This content is published under the Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 Unported license.