{"id":1249,"date":"2012-09-06T13:12:56","date_gmt":"2012-09-06T17:12:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/agrownupmarriage.com\/?p=1249"},"modified":"2015-04-21T13:38:53","modified_gmt":"2015-04-21T17:38:53","slug":"feeling-pressured","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jodymcbride.com\/agrownupmarriage.com\/feeling-pressured\/","title":{"rendered":"Feeling Pressured?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/agrownupmarriage.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/05\/3201854_s-300x200.jpg\" alt=\"Couple Arguing\" title=\"Couple Arguing\" width=\"300\" height=\"200\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-386\" srcset=\"https:\/\/jodymcbride.com\/agrownupmarriage.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/05\/3201854_s-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/jodymcbride.com\/agrownupmarriage.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/05\/3201854_s.jpg 400w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/>Recently there was a discussion on a particular forum about pressure in marriage.  Now the context of this pressure was that no one should do something they don&#8217;t want to do because they feel pressured.  Well, I didn&#8217;t quite agree with that.  See, my love for my wife makes me feel pressured to do things that I do not want to do all of the time.  If my wife wants me to go to the grocery with her and I don&#8217;t want to go to the grocery I feel pressured to do it because I want to please my wife.  When we&#8217;re somewhere we can dance I dance with my wife.  It means more to her than it does to me but I&#8217;m not going to be <em>that guy<\/em> who won&#8217;t dance with his wife.<\/p>\n<p>If <em>reasonable<\/em> desires, expectations, wants, and needs of your spouse do not make you feel pressured to meet them then there is a very good chance that you are in fact a <a href=\"http:\/\/agrownupmarriage.com\/?p=12\" title=\"Stubborn, Immature, Selfish Jerks | A Grown Up Marriage\">stubborn, immature, selfish, jerk<\/a>.  The pressure that I feel when my wonderful wife asks me to go to the grocery with her comes from a desire to please her, and to demonstrate to her that I care for her and her desires, expectations, wants, and needs.  If I did not care about her desires, expectations, wants, and needs the I would just stay home every time she asked.  <\/p>\n<p>Now there are types of pressure that we can place on our spouse that aren&#8217;t loving or respectful.  Things like manipulation, coercion, and mind-games.  This type of pressure isn&#8217;t the kind that I&#8217;m talking about.  The kind I&#8217;m talking about is when your spouse asks you for something they would like and you feel &#8220;pressured&#8221; to give it to them.  Just asking you is an act of intimacy, revealing one&#8217;s self, at its very core.  Is the pressure coming from our spouse&#8217;s reasonable request or is it coming from somewhere else?  I think the answer is somewhere else or even the <a href=\"http:\/\/agrownupmarriage.com\/?p=12\" title=\"Stubborn, Immature, Selfish Jerks | A Grown Up Marriage\">stubborn, immature, selfish, jerk<\/a> would feel the pressure.  I think it&#8217;s because we know the good that we ought to do.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>James 4:17 (NIV84)<br \/>\nAnyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn\u2019t do it, sins.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span class=\"bluetext\">The bottom line is that the pressure is created within me to do what I know to be the right thing for my wife, whether that&#8217;s going to the grocery or dancing.  So, why blame our spouse for &#8220;pressuring&#8221; us when it is in fact our love for them and a desire to please them that is causing the pressure?<\/span><\/p>\n<p>What is wrong with this type of pressure?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Recently there was a discussion on a particular forum about pressure in marriage. Now the context of this pressure was that no one should do something they don&#8217;t want to do because they feel pressured. Well, I didn&#8217;t quite agree with that. See, my love for my wife makes me feel pressured to do things [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[53],"tags":[82,46,81,52,80],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v22.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Feeling Pressured?<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Pressure is created within me to do what I know to be the right thing for my spouse. Sometimes feeling pressured to do something is good.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jodymcbride.com\/agrownupmarriage.com\/feeling-pressured\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Feeling Pressured?\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Pressure is created within me to do what I know to be the right thing for my spouse. 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